I now see why many women get pregnant with their 2nd(3rd, 4th etc)child around the time that the first is 1 year old. Get pregnant when the child is mostly good and easily managed, once the child turns into a little hellian it is too late because you are aready pregnant, no turning back. Otherwise you come to the situtation I am in...the hellian phase with a no more children outlook. Koen is completley out of control, so I am going to tell you a little about why and hope you have some help/input! He throws the worst fits known to woman(me) over the silliest things. Like for instance the last two nights have been a round of fits over scaling the changing table to touch the fan and stereo. Everytime I take him down and tell him no, he screams bloody murder and flails himself about. Like seriously is it really life or death to play with the fan/stereo. I think not. So I dont know whether I should ignore him, try to calm him, put him in time out...tell me tell me tell me!!! When he does it I totally feel at a loss. He has been doing it for about a week and a half minus when we were at Nate and Gina's.(not just about the fan about EVERYTHING)Yet he was excellent for our babysitter last night and Fine when we are out and about(mostly) He totally only does it for me at home. He is a monster. haha! Not really but I am beggining to wonder...Tonight after a terrible time putting him to bed I said to Phil "Doesn't Koens behavior make you NEVER want to have anymore kids?" and he said "No I want a kid muy bad" and I said "You already have a kid who is MUY bad!" haha! Is this what the next years of my life have in store? Please tell me no...Koen may be an only child.
Frustrated mom
haha like it was a letter.
Here are some pics of the monster scaling the changing table. Mind you I moved the baskets and he can still climb up there.
So then I put the fan in closet on top of two totes, to no avail, he climbed those too. Who does he think he is...George?
Here are some pics of the monster scaling the changing table. Mind you I moved the baskets and he can still climb up there.
So then I put the fan in closet on top of two totes, to no avail, he climbed those too. Who does he think he is...George?
18 comments:
Hoenstly, I think he's testing you. Think he's testing how much he can do. I would totally start time-out. I found myself lately not putting my foot down with Tess thinking that she's doing it for attention since my time is spent dealing with baby lately. But it's bit me in the butt. So, time-out is back in play and should have never left. They know when we're not standing ground and following through. They're smarter than we give them credit. But, as soon as the first scream comes out...give a warning then if another comes out I would head to time out. If that doesn't start working, then I'm very sorry and Koen will have to learn to play by himself, haha ;o) love you and hang in there!!
wow, sorry I wrote a novel!
I would say close his bedroom door and don't let him play in there. I know this is just one of the situations that he is fitting about but I just try to keep my kids out of sitations that are causing them fits and me greif. I know we have talked about this before, but I have heard that there should not be too many things that you say no about, so I just remove those things and when the fit comes when you do remove them just walk away. I think giving to much attention (ie: sitting in "time out" with him)gives him the attention he wants, but if you walk away your not ignoring the behavior, your just letting him know that you wont put up with it and that it is unacceptable.
Sis, you will make it through, I know it seems like a big deal when you are in the thick of it, we are all in the same situation but that is what we are here for is to teach them...to bad there isn't a handbook for this kind of stuff eh?Now that was a novel... Love you sis,
How can you say Ko throws the worst fits (have you not seen my child). It is so funny how different kids can be. Casen never had fits, Jace throws the worst ones. From what I have learned, it is best to ignore them. I tend to put Jace in time out for things he does wrong (climbing on my kitchen table and swinging my chandaler) and ignore him when he throws fits. Trust me this method has lead to a lot of humiliation. I have walked through Target, etc. with a child screaming hysterically (Try to look cute that day because everyone in the whole store will be checking you out that day). If only we all new what worked the best and the quickest. I think different things may work better for different kids. Good Luck!!
Welcome to the MOMMY CLUB of "think they are 20" stage. Roll with the punches girl, your a great mom.
I have no idea what to try... I wonder if when he's a teenager, you'll say, "Phil, remember when our biggest problem with him was playing with the stereo." I guess what I'm trying to say is try to enjoy this stage because at some point you may wish that you could turn back the clock. You are such a great mom Lesh!
Oh Sheesh, welcome to the terrible twos!! Parker is the same way. I get frusterated, but then I laugh and I think it makes it worse. We've been trying the time out thing and it seems to work...he hates it. I am just to soft and fold when he starts crying in time out. Sometimes the threat of going makes him stop what he's doing though. I don't know what to tell ya! I think it's a phase. We are finding that we meet resistance on everything these days...washing hair, taking baths, potty training, clipping fingernails, brushing teeth, picking up toys, etc.,etc. We are talking Grand Mal tantrums! It's wearing. I was hoping maybe you had some advice for me! :) Good luck! You should still have another baby because you guys make cute kids. Plus, then they can entertain each other.
Hey also check out Ann Maries page...Love and Logic? Anyway maybe there is some insite!
My first instinct was to tell you to eliminate as many problems as possible...like Lynae said, don't let him play in his room. Try to eliminate the things that are causing the tantrums. Ignoring Kade and walking in another room when he freaks out works most of the time. We are in similar situations though so I am reading all of this advice for myself. I also can't give any advice on the only child factor because I feel the same way! At least for me I can say it is still a ways away until I have to cross that bridge. EEK! Gotta love toddlers! The best and the worst at the same time.
now you've got me scared for when Tate gets a little older. maybe i should pop out all my kids now before i change my mind and put them up for adoption. I am so sorry! all i know is Meg has the same problem with her one daughter and her dr. told her to pick her battles. decide what you definitely will NOT allow, and other things that just bug ya more than anything, let it go, it's not worth the battle.
what a crazy life. I don't know what to say because I have not yet crossed that bridge. Good luck.
Wow, you're really upset. Sorry, can't help you on this one...
Sounds like you need a girls night out! See you tomorrow night. Oh kids!
Just go to my post titled "Who Are You". Cole freaking out about pretty much nothing. But aren't they so cute.... when they are sleeping? Hang in there. What's adding another crazy baby to the mix!
I know all to well your frustration, I have Frankie. I feel like I say "no" 2 million times a day. I know most moms reserve the soap for sassy mouth, but I started it with Frankie when he wouldnt listen. I would just put the tiniest bit on my figure. Now all I have to do is go for the soap and he stops. Well sometimes. Good luck.
Ok so this is what works for me...Ava is two and she does not rule over our house. I don't put things away just because she has a problem with it. We just learn to deal. I do what Laura was saying by giving 1 warning and then off to time out. But I am also with Gina. Sitting in the corner with him is giving him the attention that he wants. What I have done is put a chair in our room and close the door. The room is baby proof and she hates it not being with us. The reason for our room instead of hers is that now that she is in a big girl bed and going through the scared of the dark thing we are trying to make her room as positive as possible. She used to hit a lot and it took about 1 week to get over it. Just remember to stick to whatever you decide.
Oh baby!! I am there now too!! I am at my witts end some days! I just bought the super nanny book to read! Ha Ha Ha, I am such a geek but I love her show and she seems to know her stuff! I will let you know if I get any good advice from it. Be grateful that he doesn't freak out in public, that is the worst! yesterday I had to put Mia in time out at the mall! But at the same time it is true that this stage will pass. Once he can communicate through words better he will not have so many tantrums....at least that is what they say! :)
I feel ya Sha. It could be worse. He could be Madi and not only scale his changing table put get on top of it and get into his butt paste and rub it all over himself and his sibling like mine did and still does. I just say it's time for summer so our kids can go outside and climb on things that are suppose to climbed on. I miss the park!
You'll figure out what works best for you, Phil, and Koen! You're a great mom, Alesha!!!!!
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